This past weekend was a chaotic weekend, thunderstorms with power outages, my 50 year old house needing some plumbing TLC, and my three year old obsessing about finding Nemo (literally finding her Nemo toy) on top of getting work done, taking care of pets and people, taking care of daily tasks and maintaining some order. I started thinking about the concept of “having it all”. That concept always sounds great but is it really possible?
What I realized is that if you’re lucky and life doesn’t hand you any curve balls it might be achievable. But what if life has pitched a few curve balls like divorce, injuries, financial mishaps, or chaos in some form or another?
We all have limits.
We’re limited by time…there’s only 24 hours in a day. ⠀
We’re limited by our age at times. ⠀
We’re limited by our available resources.⠀
We’re limited by our emotional capabilities. ⠀
We’re limited by our responsibilities. ⠀
We’re limited by our physical capabilities. ⠀
At the end of the weekend, I had reached my limit and absolutely couldn’t do another thing or think another thought. The only thing I could do was to curl up in bed, read awhile, and let sleep come.
When I woke up I realized having limits impacts what you want vs. what can do right now. These two concepts are really different from each other even though they can sound like the same thing at times. Limitations impact what you want.
While we can modify, stretch the limits, or potentially change the limits, we’re not going to change them instantly. Biting off more than you can chew or expecting more of yourself than what you can deliver is a sure fire way to create emotional turbulence and chaos. Which will lead to feelings of failure which leads to proof of failure which leads to giving up i.e. FAILURE. The negative experience of failing creates Love Locks (negative, toxic, false beliefs about yourself).
What I realized is that understanding that you have limits allows you to be realistic about what you can really do. Knowing and working with your limits gives you a way to succeed…your limits are like a map for you to follow, a way to craft and adapt to your version of having it all. Rome wasn’t built in a day and your Euphoric Life can’t be created in a day either.
Having it all is realistic.
The idea of having it all isn’t really about keeping up with Joneses or a cookie cutter life, it’s about creating your own vision of a happy life and maybe having it all doesn’t mean having it all at one time.
Maybe the journey is part of the destination…the limits that you have right now are part of your journey.
Here are seven tips to help you create your version of having it all.
- Don’t compare yourself to others because they have different limits and different life experiences. So what if you do your life differently? The creation of dreams and goals isn’t a one-size fits all, do this and you’ll succeed. It’s the culmination of your experiences that has caused you to create you dreams and goals and it’s your experience that’ll allow you to achieve your goal.
- You aren’t behind and you don’t have to catch up. You set your own pace. So what if it takes you longer? Don’t give up and it’ll happen! ⠀
- Stop thinking others are better than you or that you aren’t good enough. So what if you don’t know how to do it or need to gain some skills? You can learn and you can do it! ⠀
- Embrace your limits because they make are who you are and are guiding you to your success. Knowing your limits isn’t an excuse…it’s a plan to succeed.
- Fighting your limitations or wishing you didn’t have them is a waste of your precious resources – time and energy. Instead, turn those thoughts into ways to work toward having it all.
- Embrace progress over perfection. Anytime you take a step toward your vision of having it all…celebrate. Don’t get bogged down by how far you still have to go or get upset because you aren’t there yet. Learn to praise yourself for trying and not giving up.
- Learn to Kiss the Baby Daily. This stands for kiss it simple sweetheart, take baby steps every day. Consistency is the key to creating your dream life. Work, do, and plan for it every day. Your perfect life will never be delivered by Amazon with free two day shipping. You’ve gotta keep at it.
You can have it all. Maybe not in this moment or even the next but you can have it. So don’t give up or get discouraged. As long as you’re still playing the game of life, anything can happen!